See you tomorrow
MA Art & Science Open Studio
Welcome to my section of our online open studio. I will be updating this page regularly throughout this month on my current work and videos of me working in my makeshifts bedroom studio.
Self-Portrait in my makeshift studio space
Life drawings that are currently informing my work
I am having some health issues which are resulting in really whack hormones imbalances. This is causing my mental health to really dip, I’m having extreme mood swings - most of my time in very low moods - I’m adrenaline dumping which is resulting in slightly manic points, I’m crying 3-4 times a day and my anxiety is through the roof.
I’ve always had issues with expressing anger but its reached a boiling point, as one of the only ways I was able to really let anger out truly was with music. Heavy metal gigs, alt clubs with people like me needing a space to be angry together, singing, screaming, moshing, jumping, dancing, physically moving through the anger. While I’d be wreck for days even weeks afterwards, what it did for my mental health was worth it. I didn’t quite realise how important it was until I couldn’t go.
I am still taking refuge in my music probably more than ever but its solitary now. Lonely.
Being stuck back in my teenage bedroom along with my health issues and overwhelming feelings of being trapped I'm increasingly thinking about what it's like to be a teenager. The only imagery/ideas that I can think to make are these of a writhing, silently screaming vision of myself trapped in a void of black, jolting, thrashing around. Its me but slightly off.
I want to make a video/gifs that are Tiktok friendly. I feel like the work I want to make work the I don't just share on digital platforms but the platforms are actually part of how we view the work.
In the last few years there has been quite a bit of research into tenascin-x in relation to Ehlers Danlos Syndrome (EDS). Particularly the seeming absence of tenascin-x in patients with Classical EDS and Hypermobile EDS.
In this project I am working with the symbolism of the tenascin-x protein structure as a way of dealing with the isolation the has come with being disabled and needing to shield during the current pandemic.